Chapter 2
Chapter 2 Chapter 2 I love my mom, but she is a certified safety fanatic. We already had three dead bolts on our apartment door, motion detector lights outside, and automatic timers on all our lamps. As if these things weren't enough, Mom had also customized our doorbell. Instead of ringing like other people's doorbells, our doorbell barked and growled. Mom had hooked the doorbell switch to a tape recording of a dog. "Mom," I begged, "please, please, please don't do this to me. I mean, this is
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Chapter 2
Chapter 2
I love my mom, but she is a certified safety fanatic.We already had three dead bolts on our apartment door, motion detector lights outside, and automatic timers on all our lamps.As if these things weren't enough, Mom had also customized our doorbell.Instead of ringing like other people's doorbells, our doorbell barked and growled.Mom had hooked the doorbell switch to a tape recording of a dog.
"Mom," I begged, "please, please, please don't do this to me.I mean, this is, like, totally weird. Don't make me ride with a dummy."
In spite of my whining, Mom went to work on the dummy in the kitchen.
"Our dummy will need ears," she said."What kind of ears should I make? Big ones, little ones?"
"Oh, please, please, please, Mom," I pleaded. ''Don't do this to me."
But Mom went right ahead and made the ears out of Styrofoam and glued them to the wig stand.To me, they looked like big question marks. 
"He needs a nose now, Ermaline. What type of nose should he have?A Roman nose with a bump in the middle, or maybe a snub nose …"
Mom answered her own question."I'll make him a Roman nose - a Roman nose is a good, strong nose, like an eagle's beak,"she said as she whittled the nose out of Styrofoam.Mom glued the nose on the wig stand and took a few steps back to admire her handiwork.
"He's looking good, right Ermaline?" she asked. I gagged.
